How am I going to get through this?

[Shanny]

My b/f of 6 yrs introduced me to pain pills. It started out as a once in awhile thing. Six years later I take one per day just like him. I would ask him if he thinks I am some sort of junkie and he said no, that one pill a day can't hurt. But now we've broken up. He was my source and now I have to quit. I know he didn't force me to take them, ultimately it was my decision, but I can't help but resent him. I'm left w/ having to deal w/ the heartache of a breakup and trying to drop a drug habit. I know this is drug abuse but I wouldn't say I have a severe addiction. Has anyone else experienced anything like this? Any advice or thoughts? Honestly I'd like to continue w/ the pills but I am what people call a "good girl" or at least I appear that way... innocent looking. I haven't the first clue on how to score them. He was my only source I have no idea how people find dealers in the first place.